Open Forum

You might just be a liberal if...

Posted: Thursday, April 14, 2005

Warning! You, too, may be a liberal!

Yes, friends, the evil scourge of liberalism is nefariously infiltrating our collective unconscious, turning otherwise flag-waving, apple-pie eating patriots into tax-raising bleeding hearts!

Here is a quick test to determine if this latest menace has affected YOU:

Do you support Social Security (or collect it)?

Do you receive Medicare?

Do you use guaranteed bank deposits?

Do you live in a rural area, and do you have electricity?

Do you work for at least minimum wage?

Are you a member of a union?

Did you eat hot lunches in school (or, do your children)?

Do you think poor mothers should always be able to afford formula for their babies?

Did you go to school on the G.I. Bill?

If you are a woman, do you vote?

If you are African-American, do you vote, sit at the front of the bus, or at a lunch counter with your white counterparts?

Do you enjoy breathing clean air?

Do you want your children to drink water free from arsenic and other poisons?

All of these initiatives were sponsored by liberals, and were resisted by conservatives. If you answered "yes" to one or more of the above questions, you might secretly be a liberal. The horror! The horror!

Lance Nelsen

Baxter

Glad C-I settlement was reached

For 38 school days, the people of the Crosby-Ironton School District have been divided because of a teachers' strike. I'm thrilled to see that a settlement has been reached.

But now comes the difficult task of healing the wounds that were cut by this sad experience. Both sides must work together, not only for the students, but for the entire community.

I implore each parent and student to support the agreement, and form the unbreakable bond of strengthening our neighbors and our children. I thank both sides for their ability to reach a compromise and end this lengthy ordeal.

Rep. Greg Blaine

Little Falls

District 12B



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